This is part of an ongoing series dramatizing/reviewing my playthrough of Star Wars: Knights of the Old Republic. For Part 1, click this link!

My eyes opened suddenly. Was this heaven? Nirvana? The bridge of total freedom? Then a voice approached me. It sounded like irritation personified. I closed my eyes again. I guess, I’m in hell.

Carth continued to word vomit in my direction so I just made a game out of it. I vowed that for every whiny thing he said, I would give him one slash from my vibrosword after I no longer needed him. This helped to keep me sane.

To boil it down, Carth told me we were on a planet called Taris and that we were the only survivors off of the Endar Spire, other than, he hoped, Bastila. Bastila was the Jedi that the Endar Spire was carrying but she had apparently already escaped the ship? I guess? Anyway, Carth told me that in the week (!) I had been asleep, he had done some scouting. Taris was separated into three primary segments, an upper city, a lower city and the undercity. I guess all the rich people live on top and things get worse as you go lower.

After what felt like an eternity of talking, I realize that Carth really hasn’t done much of anything over the last week beyond thinking that maybe the Swoop Gangs in the lower city have Bastila. I tell him we’ll go check things out and that finally shuts him up.

We head out the door and run headlong into a group of Sith officers holding up our new landlords. Carth tells me we should keep a low profile and just turn the other way. My conscience (and my desire to do the opposite of anything Carth says) decides to take these jerks on.

We quickly dispatch the Sith and the landlord thanks us profusely. He then lets us know not to worry about the bodies, he knows how to hide them. I make a quick mental note that our landlord must be a psychopath and head out the door.

The upper city is actually pretty nice on this planet. There are people everywhere and plenty of things to see and do. Carth and I hit up the cantina to grab a drink and find all sorts of fun things to do. We found an arena where people fight for money and folks bet on it, there was a band, it was all quite pleasant. Eventually, a woman approaches me and starts telling me about her woes.

She explains that she’s a Sith officer and that gets lonely because people don’t like her. She doesn’t seem to understand that murdering random-ass people doesn’t make friends. I collect myself, recognizing the opportunity in front of me, and try to be as charming as possible.

“You’re pretty-ful!”

She looks at me in disgust and walks off. Damn… Turns out I’m not as charming as I thought. Fortunately, some dude saw my display and apparently decided a couple of idiots was exactly what he was looking for. He invited us to a party at his apartment later he was throwing for all his Sith friends.

I wasn’t sure what to expect from a Sith party. I mean, this was the group dedicated to eternal evil and power. They could probably let loose, right? Carth and I showed up and met our benefactor, Mr… Someone. Mr. Someone seems excited that these random people he’d never met before showed up to his party and called for rounds for everyone. They all cheered, drank and passed out. Not even sure what else to say here.

I tell Carth to grab what we can, imitating Sith officers may be helpful to finding Bastila. As luck would have it, we managed to find some Sith uniforms, just our size! Now, it’s time to check out the world from the Sith perspective…